Monday, October 19, 2009

Real Quick...



WTF? Balloon Boy? Please float away now.

More importantly, Madonna is dancing too much and causing a ruckus in her new apt in NYC. I never thought there would be too much of Madonna.

Oprah is still Oprah.

Strangely, Comcast is the devil via Twitter. Just tweet "Comcast sucks" and see what you're response is.

PS - I still love Hoda and KLG even though I have a job and don't have time to watch them.

PPS - Although I got a twitter account I will never use it.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Life is Easier for Bob Dole Now


Well move over viagra there's a new Sheriff in town. It appears that a new product may soon hit the market where you just have to rub a solution on your self and voila you're ready for action. I assume this will be a quicker process than the jagged little pill that you take now. I don't know from personal experience, but I'm guessing a rub gets to the point quicker so to speak. I'm sure the ladies out there will be THRILLED. This brings a whole new meaning to 'is your hand broken?'

Read here for more info.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Happy Birthday, Elizabeth Regina!


God Save the Queen! Today is Queen Elizabeth II's 83rd birthday. She has ruled the United Kingdom for nearly 60 years and has really seen a lot. She's been around the world, visited exotic locales, seen her daughter-in-law raise the profile of the monarchy and later almost bring it to its knees. Hey, I just thought of something though, my grandma turns 93 next week and she's seen a lot too. Yes, my grandma still lives on her own and drives (YES, DRIVES) and seems to be getting along swimmingly. Strangely my family has to call my grandma, Her Majesty as well....

Anyway, Her Majesty (Queen Elizabeth II) is likely spending her day doing nothing of the sort, probably going through offical papers. Happy Birthday!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Twitter-Dee and Twitter-Dumb


Her Excellency, Oprah, is apparently dedicating a whole entire show (Friday live) to Twitter. F! F! F! I don't want to Twitter and now here comes Jesus on the Tweet and we're all going to have to start doing it now. I WILL NOT! I WILL NOT. It's bad enough that I use the Facebook like nobody's business. I don't need to be sucking on the Tweet! I don't like the TWEETS. What would Sofia from the Color Purple think of all this? She would punch an old geezer named Biz Stone (co-founder of Twitter) if she knew anything about his tweets. LORD CHILD! Listen, Whoopi said it best on the View the other day, no one cares if I'm sitting on the can!

Click here to read more about Ms. Winfrey's next show about Twitter with Ashton Kutcher.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Ain't That the Truth, Anderson



Anderson Cooper gives his opinion on teabagging.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Just When I Thought I'd Dropped My Last Ounce of Dignity

My GOD this woman will sell her soul to make a dime! Kathie Lee now has a damn book out on top of her million ridiculous CDs that no one gives two sh*ts about (see Two Sh*ts here). Here she comes again to tell snipits about her life. So what? Who cares? Yes, the woman does botox all the time AND uses a qtip for some purpose that I can't figure out.

You know I have a love/hate relationship with Kathie Lee mostly because her laugh and googly eye bother me, and she picks on Hoda. Well anyway, I wish her luck. I see this becoming a discount book super fast. Keep me updated.

Here's the video of her plugging her book on Hoda and Kathie Lee this morning.

I Think I'm a Redskins Fan Now



Hello everyone - Meet Shaun Suisham. Many folks met Shaun yesterday at the White House Easter Egg Roll 2009 where he entertained and read to children. Shaun is 27 and a kicker for the Washington Redskins. Therefore, I'm now a fan of the Washington Redskins.

God he looks sexy huh?

Let's be frank here, though. It's not that I haven't been a fan of the Washington Redskins, it's just that they haven't had a good season in so long that it's hard to remain a fan. Ok, I didn't grow up in Washington and I'm sure I'm committed a blasphemous act by saying the Redskins aren't that great, but listen, I get it. I get that fans are loyal and I respect that. But how many times can you be kicked down before you give up? Come on people!

Anyway, click here to learn more about Shaun and his NFL stats. Yes, he's married... to a woman. She best be hot!

Photos courtesy of R. David Photography.

Monday, April 13, 2009

OH F*CK ME!



GOD. PLEASE LET THIS BE THE ONLY ONE!

Click here.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Southland Benji


So this is Benjamin McKenzie. I'm sure his friends just call him Ben so I will too. Ben will star tonight in a new show called "Southland" about South Central L.A. cops (I think.). I will watch in the hopes that Ben takes his shirt off. I mean, I want to see it because it's a John Wells show and he started the West Wing and others... oh hell, I just want to see if he takes his shirt off. GOD.

Ben was on Hoda and Kathie Lee today. Here's the clip.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Don Lemon

I ain't one to gossip, so you didn't hear this from me. But eyewitnesses report that last night, Don Lemon (studly CNN anchor) was spotted at the Washington DC gay bar, The Duplex Diner. As he left the diner, he wore a cute blue patagonia-style jacket and walked out with a bunch of other cute guys and another on-air CNN correspondent (No, not Anderson Cooper).

So, Is Don Lemon gay? You be the judge on that. BPF speculated before (click here). Anyway, I doubt any of you care. No one is watching CNN anymore apparently. Click here to read more on the CNN ratings slip. But I ain't one to gossip, so you didn't hear that from me.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Best Talk Show on TV


WATCH BONNIE HUNT! She is incredibly funny and doesn't miss a beat. Yesterday she had Brian Williams from NBC's Nightly News. Brian himself was hilarious but you have to understand that Bonnie has a huge crush on Brian and it gets really really awkward!

But back to Bonnie. I think that she hits it out of the park every day.

Click here to visit the site.

You Gotta Love Some Dolly (Ladies too)




I just read this article below and thought 'Give me a break!' Dolly Parton's tee-tahs are not lesbian. She's got the big ol' girls and they like the boys I am SURE. Dolly being a lesbian wouldn't be a bad thing for the gay movement, but we won't have a gay icon if she actually becomes GAY. Lord.

Click here to read the atrocious rumors.

Monday, March 23, 2009

OH NO! MATT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH Sweet Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Matt Lauer injured himself this weekend when he hit a deer while riding his bike. Oh God oh GOD don't let Matt DIE! Ok, he apparently just dislocated his shoulder and needs a quick surgery, but you know he's one of the last of a dying breed that I can stand to look at and listen to on the tv in the morning. If Matt goes down, so does the Today Show.

Read more here.

Will They Be Regular Size?

Apparently, USAID, which distributes millions of condoms to developing countries to reduce the spread of HIV/AIDS has decided to no longer use an American company to supply the condoms to the world. They have chosen a Chinese manufacturer to make the rubbers.

I only have one question, will they be manufactured for the average size for a man or the size of the Chinese? Hey! I'm just saying!

Click here for more.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Head Case is a GREAT Show


So I have come across an hilarious show on Starz (hell no I don't subscribe to Starz, but you can get it on Netflix and see it at http://www.starz.com). Alexandra Wentworth (wife to ABC's George Stephanopoulos) plays a therapist to celebrities and the celbs actually play themselves. Some notables are Alanis Morrisette, Jason Priestly, James Denton, Jeff Goldblum and others. She's a comic genius and I'm shocked that she is married to George Stephanopoulos who is a total bore. Her character is a total narcissist and does all kinds of crazy shit to "help" her clients. I think that I might be a narcissist myself and totally relate. But anyway, if you have Netflix then you need to order this shit, ASAP!

Friday, March 13, 2009

Friday the 13th


Hey y'all - Today is Friday the 13th. Do I care? NO. Did I ever see one of those Jason movies when I was a kid. NO. I did see one Nightmare on Elm Street and never again wanted to see a Freddy or Jason movie. F that!

I think what's more important is Sunday is the Ides of March. I always remind people to beware because one of your skanky friends could stab you in the back and you won't even know until you are kissing the feet of Jesus.

Homo out.

I Know Why Frank Gifford Cheated on Kathie Lee



So on the Today Show with Hoda and Kathie Lee this morning, Frank Gifford co-hosted with his wife Kathie Lee Gifford. My guess is ratings plummeted today, but that's not the point. Frank was considerably out of it and you can tell he is incredibly annoyed by his wife. He basically hates her and hates that she made him do this show.

Frank Gifford is a million years old (actually 78) and he walks around like an old man who can barely stand. And Frank told Kathie Lee that she would not have been able to handle him when he reached his peak. Yeah, that's why he got a hooker and cheated on KL! DUH! I mean he could probably tape the hooker's mouth shut and can't do that at home with Kathie Lee. You know she never shuts up. God, I would have an affair too.

Anyway, check out the video above for a little taste and see why Frank is a cheater.

PS - For you dumbasses who don't know who Frank Gifford is or why he's famous then click here. F - I'm gay and I even know.

Dwayne Johnson


Dwayne Johnson is one hot MOFO! Damn. He's been everywhere promoting his new movie, Race to Witch Mountain, and I can't get enough of him. I know I won't go watch some Disney movie to see the Rock, because I'm sure he ain't taking his clothes off, but I would love to see his smile. It's gorgeous. Anyway, he was just on Jay Leno tonight and he looked like he could break out of his suit and make love to me at any moment. Is it hot in here?

Ok sorry about that. Did you see him on Saturday Night Live? His ass was sooo hot. Check out the video.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Today Show Goes Nude



This CRACKS me up! For some reason, Matt, Mere-death, Al and Ann-oying Curry went to an art school and ended up painting two nudes. This is so funny. Too bad Matt wasn't one of the nudes. But the good part is the guy who was the nude is nice to look at.

Enjoy.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Shameless Shirtless Pic - Shemar Moore


Shemar Moore is hot. Single. About to be 39. Gay? Maybe. He's on the cover of Men's Fitness this month. Hot. And stars in Criminal Minds which I don't watch but I bet he takes his shirt off a lot. Yummy